THE HEALING POWER OF LAMENT
We live in a broken world, a world where we should anticipate the tragic and traumatic to impact us and those we love. It is in these moments that I am often asked an array of questions. One such question I have been asked is, "How should we respond to tragedy as followers of Jesus? In our brokenness, we can at times respond in these ways:
Blame: We can use this as an opportunity to find someone or something in our culture to blame. We can make this situation about issues and reform. But, as we have all witnessed through the years, this doesn't help; it causes more division.
Explain: We can engage the conversation with answers to why this is happening and maybe even present a solution. This approach can seem insensitive and distant to the pain experienced, not just by those directly impacted but also by the community. I found it interesting that in one newscast I watched this week, their goal was to determine if this tragedy would be considered a mass shooting. Why is that our response? People's lives have been forever altered, and we are reporting on whether or not we qualify for a mass shooting? This doesn’t seem to impact the sorrow we are experiencing or connect to how Jesus would respond.
Dismiss: We can go on with life like nothing happened.
Focus on Self: We can make ourselves the center of the story regardless of how close or far from direct involvement we may have been.
But I think, as followers of Jesus, our response should first and foremost be LAMENT.
What is lament?
Lament is the expression of our pain, sorrow, and grief directly to God. Lament is talking to God about what we are feeling due to what we are experiencing in our world. Lament is a prayer that is founded in trust that God has the answer. One article put it this way, “Laments turn toward God when sorrow tempts you to run from him.”
Why is lament a good response?
Lament reminds me a lot of that children's movie that came out in 2015 called Inside Out. In this movie, the emotions of a young girl are put to the test when she faces an unwanted move to a brand new city with brand new friends. This movie illustrates the truth that sadness (lament) is an essential gift that God gives us to help us in tragedies like what we are experiencing in Boise this week.
We live in a broken and hurting world. Meaning, tragedy is inevitable. Lament is an indispensable tool to help us engage the pain of our community. It is a necessary step toward true healing and finding a real solution.
I read an article where the author was facing cancer and lamenting the idea of not growing old with his wife. In speaking about a friend's advice, he says, "She helped me understand that a sufferer laments when he or she experiences and expresses the sorrow he is feeling. When words fail, lament helps those who've endured suffering express their pain, sorrow, and grief."
When we, as Christians, express our pain, sorrow, and grief, we model and give permission for others to express their pain, sorrow, and grief. At this moment, we, and those joining us, can experience the healing presence of God. It is in honest reflection and expression that the Holy Spirit is given access to bring his comfort. In these moments, we can open ourselves up to experience the promise of peace from God. Consider John 16:33, "I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world."
Amid crisis, lament allows us to process our pain with God, renew trust in him, and love and engage others in their pain. Psalm 34:18 says, "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit." And one way he reveals himself as near is through you and me, our physical presence and tangible acts of love as we engage others in their lament.
As we lament, we permit others to express their pain, and in this, we must anticipate and be ready to love and exemplify trust in God through simply being present. This can't happen if we don't have the margin to be available.
Jesus is an excellent example of this, an example we are asked to follow. He says in Luke 4:18-19, "The Spirit of the Lord is upon me because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor."
Notice that Jesus met people in their pain. It is here that the miraculous can happen, and those lamenting can experience true and eternal joy.
How do we lament?
What does that look like to practice lament? I like the steps given in the article I read by Mark Vroegop, “Dare to Hope in God”:
Turn to God: address God with what you are facing. Consider Psalm 13:1 as an example, “How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?”
Bring your pain: Consider Psalm 13:2 as an example, “How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?”
Ask boldly for help: Consider Psalm 13:3-4 as an example, “Consider and answer me, O Lord my God; light up my eyes, lets I sleep the sleep of death…”
Choose to trust: This is the point and destination of lament. Consider Psalm 13:5-6, “But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me."
Our response matters. In our lament, we will see people as Jesus sees them. In our lament, we can process our pain, worry, grief, and resolve our trust in God, allowing us to respond to people as Jesus responds to them. In our lament, we can bring hope to a very hopeless situation, the true hope of Jesus Christ.